Words you cant unsay

H. R. NIGHTMARE

There are signs out there we never see, so stop looking.

Every day we see signs right? Right. Good glad you all agree. Now, when we see signs mostly we ignore them. However, I have found that when you stop looking for signs that’s when the best ones stand out, like this one:

You just gotta feel good when you see that.

It’s like waking up fully knowing you’re screwed from the get go.

Anyway, if you keep not looking you might see some good news coming up ahead, like this:

If it wasn’t for that sign right there I would never have known that! I always thought that the water on the road came from under the pavement to rinse off the dirt.

When you drive there is always the chance you might be able to get some really important things done. Now is when you start looking for signs for what to get done like:

This is my regular drycleaner. Thank God she knows what she is doing. Sometimes there’s a wait to pick up my drycleaning so I like to venture out for a walk. One of my favorite places to go and relax is…

If you’re not sure where that is, it is just past…

Let me tell you, after a restful walk I become quite hungry and need a place to eat. But sometimes the eating establishments around here are lacking in the personal touch department. This one however is not.

After such a lovely meal and dessert, I personally get really tired.

I would love to take a nap. I’m so glad that this place is right next door:

After a nap and having a full belly it’s time to finish up my errands, so off I go again.

Off to the doctors. Being my age certain things are a must like:

Don’t get me wrong, I wasn’t looking for this place. I found it from a sight, in fact it was this sign,

Now what man can resist a colorful sign like that?

But when I got there; boy was I suprised.

After I turned the corner this next sign brightened my day:

Guess where I’m going…

Anyway that was pretty much my day. There was one last sign I saw on the drive home that spoke volumes to me:

 I FORGOT TO PEE ALL DAY.

So keep your eyes open and see the signs ahead, because some of the funniest things we find

we were never looking for in the first place.

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January 14, 2012 Posted by | practical jokes, real world | , , , , , , , , | 11 Comments

1-1-12 news.

*******************Breaking News*********************

3 GREEK GODDESSES FOUND DEAD TODAY IN WHAT SEEMS TO BE A MASS SUICIDE.

Reports coming from an inside source at the FBI indicate that three bodies were found today in the penthouse at Trump Towers

They have been identified as the Greek Goddesses:

Aphrodite, Hestia, and Athena

Aphrodite was best known as the Goddess of love, beauty and desire.

Hestia was best known as the Goddess of  the hearth, home and cooking.

Athena, The goddess of wisdom, warfare, battle strategy, heroic endeavour, handicrafts and reason.

*

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There were approximately 6 different prescriptions, empty booze bottles and a note on the table in the main room.

We have received a copy.

*

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We now release these mortal bodies to the pages of history and make way for the new Goddesses to take our place.

Ms. Megan can now take her spot as  HESTIA the goddess of hearth, home and cooking.

Ms. SparkleBumps, is now open to receive the name APHRODITE, and become the goddess of love, beauty and desire

and

Ms. Ellis, is free to receive the gift of becoming ATHENA, goddess of wisdom heroic endeavors and reason.

So raise a glass and drink of the wine.

blessed be to the new.

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There shall be a press release later in the day as to the relationship between these decided and the names mentioned.

Police are now searching for Ms. SparkleBumps, Ellis and Megan.

Reports state that Ms. Bumps was last seen being lowered from a large tower,

Ms. Ellis is believed to be tormenting the internet and blog world from an undisclosed bunker somewhere in North America.

And according to her family, Ms. Megan was seen blending in with a pack of tigers completing research for an upcoming book.

If you have any information regarding the whereabouts of these ladies please inform your local police department.

January 1, 2012 Posted by | practical jokes, real world | , , , , , , | 43 Comments

WHEN the hell.. haha moment

Time, ok it’s there, it’s here and apparently it’s everywhere.

However, there is nothing worse than forgetting that…

www.youtube.com/watch?v=j6ErUrFu9xk&feature=related

December 18, 2011 Posted by | practical jokes | , , , , , , | 7 Comments