Words you cant unsay

H. R. NIGHTMARE

Advise from HRs memory

 
 
 
 
Alright, so I have had some time to think back and reflect on my younger years, now that my oldest has graduated high school and looking to make HIS mark on the world.
And I have come up with a few words of advise to pass along to the next generation…
 
#1. When the officer says “get down on the ground now !” and adds “OR ELSE!” Just get down, the or else part friggin hurts A LOT.
 
#2. While skateboarding, water ski style behind your best buddy’s pick up truck driving down the road at 60 mph, make sure there is enough rope that if he slams on the brakes and skids to a stop, you have time to go around the truck instead of through the back window. AND wear a helmet.
 
#3. If at all possible in your growing years try your best to NOT sleep with your best friends sister OR his mother. that really puts a strain on a friendship.
 
#4. While out for a fun filled evening with your buddy, do not get the bright idea to drive 2 states away in a 2 seat er car with 2 husky guys, 1 beanpole skinny mother-fucker and a miniature claustrophobic hulk boy with a bad temper and a short fuse. (the blood stains never come out of the upholstery)
 
and
 
#5. When shit doesn’t seem to go quite right and you think there is no one in the world who would understand, remember there is always some one who will just listen and not try to fix you.
 
and last but not least there is one more small tidbit of advise i shall pass on before saying byby
 
*
Good luck everyone.
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June 28, 2012 - Posted by | real world, Uncategorized | , , , , ,

29 Comments »

  1. If the two in #3 didn;t happen at the same time, I don’t see what the problem is…

    Comment by El Guapo | June 28, 2012 | Reply

    • Yeah not at the same time, trust me I tried.

      Comment by hrnightmare | June 28, 2012 | Reply

  2. #2- Duh. Amateur.

    Comment by GingerSnaap | June 28, 2012 | Reply

    • I wasnt exactly sober at the time.

      Comment by hrnightmare | June 28, 2012 | Reply

      • Did you really need to clarify that?

        Comment by GingerSnaap | June 28, 2012 | Reply

        • Actually yes, I’ve done dumber stuff when completely stone sober, like parking a car on the high school roof, snowboarding behinds a trash truck, nailing and glueing all the princables furniture to the ceiling in his office.

          Comment by hrnightmare | June 28, 2012 | Reply

          • Now you’re just showing off.

            Ans when is YOUR book coming out?

            Comment by GingerSnaap | June 28, 2012 | Reply

            • I have a book? Oh you mean the police reports all put in one binder, that’s a never ending story. But really I have no idea, maybe when I get time to sit down and write it. these storey don’t make them selves you know.
              and i wasn’t showing off, or trying to show off, If I where I would have told you about the day I found out that police radios travel faster then I can drive.. but I wont bore you with that.. 🙂

              Comment by hrnightmare | June 28, 2012 | Reply

              • Umm, I think your story has, in fact, already made itself.
                It’s called an Auto-Biography-written by you-about you.

                Comment by GingerSnaap | June 28, 2012 | Reply

                • wouldent that be bragging?

                  Comment by hrnightmare | June 28, 2012 | Reply

                  • Noooooo. It would be a cautionary tale that would sell bazillions of copies.

                    It could also be called ‘saving for retirement’.

                    Comment by GingerSnaap | June 28, 2012 | Reply

                    • A cautionary tale … Sounds interesting.
                      What should the title be ‘ DON’T DO THIS SHIT ‘
                      Ooh better Dumb shit for dummy’s

                      Comment by hrnightmare | June 28, 2012

                    • Dumb Shit For Dummies & How To Live to Tell About It.

                      It’s really catchy!

                      Comment by GingerSnaap | June 28, 2012

                    • I like it 🙂

                      Comment by hrnightmare | June 28, 2012

                    • Awesome! I get 5% of all book profits, then!

                      Comment by GingerSnaap | June 28, 2012

                    • Maybe 3% but you have to write it, ok?

                      Comment by hrnightmare | June 28, 2012

                    • 10% and I am NOT writing it.

                      Comment by GingerSnaap | June 28, 2012

                    • Q: How does it if feel making millions and lding it all within 15 miniutes?
                      Just kidding if I do end up writing a book and do intact use that title you shall be compensated for your efforts.
                      $20 bucks should cover it. Right?

                      Comment by hrnightmare | June 28, 2012

                    • $20,000000000000 zillion will be great!

                      Comment by GingerSnaap | June 28, 2012

                    • It would, where you gonna get that?

                      Comment by hrnightmare | June 28, 2012

                    • From YOU when you write that cautionary tale/ auto-biography thingy with the really catchy title.

                      Pay attention!

                      Comment by GingerSnaap | June 28, 2012

                    • I have a book? Wow. What’s it called? Is it good? What’s it about?

                      Comment by hrnightmare | June 28, 2012

  3. For number 2, does skiing behind a snowmobile in a field full of moguls qualify as a life lesson? It does prove, to some degree, that ice is bad for you as well.

    Comment by John Phillips | June 28, 2012 | Reply

  4. […] and they really should have seen it coming, two amazing people who emailed into my life are H.E and HR, HR keeps me smiling no matter what and well H.E. is just amazing. My boyfriend Ben who supports me […]

    Pingback by College = Done! « verynormal | June 30, 2012 | Reply

  5. Add on the withdrawal method doesn’t work 😉

    Comment by Megan Stephenson | June 30, 2012 | Reply

  6. I have enjoyed reading a few of your posts this morning, I somehow found you when i did an image search for naughty boy. I wish I could add you to one of my readers, like bloglovin, feedly or networked blogs. Just because I cleaned out my inboxes and I am trying to keep my email free from blog feeds. Ida

    Comment by Reflex Reactions | February 24, 2014 | Reply


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